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My Vision for Go Big!
On March 7, 2008 my life got turned upside down. I was unexpectedly diagnosed with a brain tumor which was so not on my to do list! Equally unexpectedly, I had neurosurgery on March 20 and the results of the biopsy indicated that the tumor was benign. Thank God! Along this journey, I have taken solace in the fact that this is a huge opportunity for us all.
I am a clinical psychology doctoral student at Vanderbilt University. For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to make a huge difference in the world. For a couple of days, I actually feared that I had wished this scary and chaotic experience on myself and my loved ones, but then I was reminded that "life prepares life" and it all started making a bit more sense.
In a whirlwind of pre-operative appointments, Dr. Kyle Weaver, my neurosurgeon, told me that I should "hold onto my blood" which was a huge blow to me as I try to be a regular blood donor. Without skipping a beat, however, my advisor, Dr. Bruce Compas, made me an offer to "pick up the slack" which I believe was the impetus for this whole GO BIG challenge as it struck me then that perhaps we can all be doing just a little more.
As a person who hopes to make a profession and a life of helping children and families, I'm committed to helping others in the best way I know how. Consistently, I work with parents and children teaching them to praise the good and ignore the bad. Not my idea, but it is a behavioral principle that works. Now, don't get me wrong--I'm not blind to the evil in this world. In fact, I'm struck by our culture's fascination with drama, hurt, despair, and scandal. It absolutely blows my mind that these negatives suck so much of our attention that we can relatively easily forget all of the 1000's acts of kindness that are going on right this very minute.
My hope is that this website can be a central location for all of us to capture all of the really awesome things that we are already doing and that we can all be inspired by each other's goodness. It's not an original or courageous idea (although some have called it that), it is just an opportunity to do something that I've always wanted to do. And, I'll bet that if I'm anything like you, I'm just doing the best that I can in this moment. Sometimes that means that I offend people. We are all imperfectly perfect and I know that that is where the true beauty lies.
There are no absolute rules because I couldn't possibly predict the creative and imaginative ways that we can each help one another. Well, that's a lie. There is really just one rule: do what you feel in your heart! Try not to feel like what you do doesn't matter. It does! If you don't believe me, read the postings for yourself and see what you think. To somebody in that moment, you will have made a difference and for that I am eternally grateful.
So if you feel it in your heart or your head or whatever pushes you to act, try to do something. Nothing is too small and nothing is too big. Just put one foot in front of the other, and if you wish, take a risk.
Overwhelmed with a sea of emotions and an outpouring of support from our community, Austin, the love of my life, and I have felt so very blessed. I believe that there is always meaning out there in this precious world of ours, sometimes you just have to squint to find it. This past several weeks has been a truly rock ride and my guess is that life always will be. So, step aboard if you are up for the challenge and let's see how far we can get this good to spread.
With great gratitude,
21 comments:
I went to the Peabody post office this morning and discovered that the gate was down, as if they were closed. It turns out they were operating from the copy center to the right because the gate was broken. As I was mailing my packages, another woman approached the broken gate, gave a frustrated look, then started walking away. I caught up with her to let her know that the post office was indeed open and pointed her in the right direction; she seemed really happy and relieved, and as she thanked me I thought, "Go big!" ;)
Hi Jenni,
My name is Amy and I am a friend of Alanna's. She let me know about you and about this website. Although we've never met, I have been very touched by your spirit and optimism. I too am a Clinical Psychology student and I too am getting ready to start internship, and this really throws everything into perspective for me.
Today, Alanna and I - both needle-shy and of the squirmy disposition when it comes to blood - will be donating blood here at Duke. You have inspired me not only to do this today, but hopefully to make a habit of it.
Take care and I hope you continue your speedy recovery!
Amy
Simple things...
Hi, Jenni. Today, when I was parking, I noticed a stray plastic bottle in the parking lot, so I picked it up and put it in the recycling. Small deed, but inspired by you!!!
I hope to see you soon!
Shelly
On my way into work I ran ahead to open the door for a man walking with a cane. He was very appreciative.
Lots of love and good wishes from CA.
Our "Go Big" actions for yesterday were actually pretty small...we tried to help out a local mom and pop store by paying for each coffee refill we had (and we had several) instead of capitalizing on their free-refill offer.
For all of those who didn't go home for Easter, we gathered at my house and had a wonderful meal together. It was so nice to have family away from family. :)
Hi Jenni,
We've never met, but I work for Todd Cohen's mom. Just wanted to let you know about a wonderfully kind ocurrence in my life. The day before your surgery our dogsitting arrangements fell through for a trip I had planned to Mammoth Mountain with my 16-year-old son. I was about to cancel the trip when a neighbor called offering the services of her mother, who was here from the East Coast for medical treatment for a back injury at Cedars Sinai. Her mother took care of our dogs for five days, visiting them three times a day and once even picking dog poop up off the livingroom floor, refusing payment, saying she was "just being neighborly."
Thank you for bringing us all together and inspiring us to "Go Big."
I was going to a focus group with a number of Chinese Senior Citizens this morning. I decided to take them little gifts. Their reaction was worth ten times the value of the gifts. It is all about going big for Jenni! I hope today is a bright day.
Love,
Jane Cohen
Hi Jenni-
So I have a couple of very small acts of kindness from the weekend, mostly involving encounters in the grocery store. When I got to the checkout this weekend and I had just picked up a couple of things, I saw a lane at the same time as another lady who had about 5 times as much stuff as me. She absolutely insisted I go ahead of her, which I thought was very nice of her! Then, in the parking lot I noticed two stray carts by my car. I wanted to just leave them because it was cold and I was technically not even in the Kroger parking lot, so had a long way to trek to take them to the cart return, but I took them over so that the person collecting the carts wouldn't have to walk so far out of their way. Small things, I know.
My last thing is that I cooked Easter dinner for my mom and brother yesterday so that we could spend the holiday together! Thanks for all the inspiration :)
I surprised the office staff at VAPOC with cookies in the afternoon from Panera - a big hit even though a small thing. Also I offered to mail some things for a stressed out colleague on my way home. Honestly, your inspiration is changing who I am as I think daily about kindness. Go Big for Jenni! Sheryl M.
Saturday night was cold and windy here in nyc and of course there wasn't a cab in sight. I was waiting on the corner for 20 minutes and so was this elderly couple. Finally a taxi came...my first thought was to jump in the taxi before they did...instead I thought of Jenni and I offered them the cab instead. They were so shocked. No one EVER does that in new york!
Jenni,
I am Jane Cohen's friend and you are very much in my thoughts and prayers every day as I wish you a very successful recovery.
Meredith Murad
Hey J-dogg,
In the spirit of helping others, I stopped to help a man with directions today who was walking around campus, totally lost. And then I brought Latif lunch today because he had a test over his lunch break and didn't have time to go get something. Small, I know. I'll try and get bigger as the week progresses :)
Hi Jenni- I'm a friend of Lynette's(was her roommate her first year down in Nashville)- I appreciate your belief that nothing is too small to post here. I'm a resident and so part of me feels my acts of kindness these days should be expected rather than celebrated (I mean- isn't it my job to be kind?). But you're right- paying attention to them will encourage more.
So here it is- my most memorable for the day (or night). I'm on nights in the hospital now and tonight I helped a scared patient who was having trouble sleeping. I fluffed her pillows, helped her roll over on her side and turned out her lights for her.
I'm thinking of you and hoping for the best- I'm glad things have gone well and you're at home!
Hi Jenni--
Darlene and I coded a tape together and got 83% reliability! Not exactly an act of kindness, but it is devoted to our excellent trainer! Thanks for all the first class training and patience with me this year.
Madeleine
Hey Jenni,
I hope you had a good Easter. Even though I didn't get a chance to go home (to Ohio), I had a wonderful time with my Aunt, Uncle, and cousins in Brentwood. They took me out to brunch and out to a movie (10,000 BC - wait for it on DVD). I then had the opportunity to teach my cousin some "Sweet Home Alabama" on guitar and "Jump" on the piano.
Peace,
Ian
Jenni
So glad that the surgery went well and you are feeling better. I like when Lynette said that Bruce described you as taking a short nap. I just picture you waking up and talking a mile a minute like you always do. I hope my fanatasy is somewhat true and you are feeling more like yourself.
I have been trying to think of nice things to do for people as you have wanted. Yesterday I gave bus fare to an old man trying to get to a men's shelter for the night. Thought of you as I often hurry past situations like that.
Keep feeling better and I hope I get to see you soon!
Love, Lauren
Every time I checked my email today, I first clicked on a website that gives free mammograms (each click= a free mammogram for a woman).
http://www.thebreastcancersite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=2
Kindness given- I got over my fear and donated blood for the first time.
Kindness received- My friend Amy, knowing how much I wanted to give blood in Jenni's honor and how scared I was to do it, signed up to give blood with me. Her moral support made a huge difference:)
Last night Jess & Kristen Robinson presented me with my birthday present-- lots of goodies that you can only get in Cincinnati! So sweet of them to think of me while they were home last weekend!
And I gave Jen & Elizabeth a ride to the airport at 4:45am this morning...in honor of you, which made it much less painful to get up so early!
Jenni,
Good to hear you are recovering well.
Today a customer who isn't likely to be able to pay me because of the housing collapse here called and wanted some copies on credit. I told him to come on in; not to worry about it. (we all have to eat)
John
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